Spaghetti or Koinonia

I have been thinking quite a bit about what “community” means. Partially because we have successfully navigated through the season of Lent and are now in the Easter Season. Like most churches we have the spike in attendance on Easter Sunday. (One congregation that sends me their newsletter has a “low Sunday potluck” on the Sunday after easter since there is such an attendance drop)

This year was no different for us. Typically we have about 150 adults on a Sunday and about 45 kids in Sunday School. On Easter we had 283 (But whose counting?? :-) As I looked out over the congregation I noticed that we didn’t have a whole lot of visitors. We have found ourselves in this strange area where we have quite a few families that come one sunday a month or maybe two. When we all show up at the same time there is around 250 of us.

So as we as a congregation are taking steps to build a “community” (see “So how’d we get here?” post) What is it that seems to keep these folks from connecting more fully but not willing to leave all together?

As I think about it (and most of this post is just my processing, please post any comments you have!) I think there are some principles of church growth that apply. We see ourselves as a much more friendly place than we are in reality (reality seems to be a tough place for us to live) We do a great job of welcoming and making those who wander in feel at home. 4 weeks later - not so much. We’ve been trained to be friendly to visitors just like the books say, but after your not “new” say 4-6 visits we tend to ignore you and a year later I hear lots of “what happened to that couple.... what's their name?.... you know the woman with the thing and her husband... with the kids... you know .... what happened to them?” I assume that's part of it. Is it just that the demographic that we are seeing come are just more sporadic? Could be...

For 20-30 something year old parents with small kids and who have little Church back ground or are trying to rediscover something of a faith they value, one Sunday a month might be pretty good. ... I don’t think I buy that one.

I guess I’m continually challenged by the fact that I don’t believe a life of faith in Jesus Christ can be lived in isolation or anonymously. I’ve always been troubled by what a lot of congregations call “koinonia groups” (If your congregation has them I apologize) They trouble me because in my experience with them, they have little to do with “koinonia” in my opinion. Usually they have more to do with superficial spaghetti dinners and photocopied fill-in-the-blanks Bible studies. Not the groups that share their lives and build communities of support and growth. When crisis of faith or the dark night of the soul closes in, I don’t feel like its those superficial groups that provide an anchor or link back to Christ’s body.

My fear is that as I see these people tentatively connected to us, they are on there way to disappearing rather than testing the waters to join us in a deeper way. I may be wrong.

I hope God reveals to us more what it means to genuinely care for each other, and that we would be a community that embodies Christ to one another and our world.